The Harbor Children’s Alliance and Victim Center (215 W. Railroad in Port Lavaca; phone 552-1982) reminds us that April is awareness and prevention month for both child abuse and sexual abuse. All types of child abuse affect a child, often with lifelong effects. Many adults who have trouble managing their emotions and developing healthy relationships were the victims of some type of abuse. Often this leads to a dependency on alcohol and/or drugs, and attitudes and behavior resulting in an unproductive life, perhaps even incarceration.

Sometimes parents who were the victims of abuse unwittingly perpetuate abuse on their own children. The Harbor offers Parenting and Anger Resolution classes which can be of help in such situations. Call 552-1982 for information on these classes.

Of course, it is important to discipline your child, but in a way that will be helpful, not hurtful to him. Here are some points to consider from Child Discipline Guideline: Guidelines for Parents by Gary May:

What is the Difference Between Discipline and Abuse?

Discipline helps a child learn a lesson that will carry over and positively affect future behavior.

Abuse affects the future in a negative way, leading to anger, hatred and more deviant behavior.

Discipline enhances the child’s sense of self worth, helping the child learn self-control and thus becoming comfortable within the family and in society.

Abuse robs the child of self worth and causes him/her to feel outcast and resentful.

Discipline is not shame or guilt.

Abuse is shame and guilt which satisfies the needs of the parents at the moment and destroys the self image of the child in a hostile manner.

Discipline is taught by example. But so is Abuse!

Sometimes parents cross the line between discipline and abuse. Here are some ways from Helpguide.org that might help you know:

• You can’t stop the anger.

• You feel emotionally detached from your child.

• Meeting the daily needs of your child seems impossible.

• Other people express concern.

Perhaps you have come upon a situation where you felt a parent was physically or emotionally abusing his/her child. You probably didn’t know how to address the situation, or thought the parent’s action might be justified, or just thought it was none of your business. Here are some tips on what your could do, from the National Committee to Prevent Child Abuse:

Start: Start a conversation with the adult to direct attention away from the child.

Divert: Talk to the child to divert the child’s attention if misbehaving.

Look: Look for the first opportunity to praise the parent and child.

Offer: Offer assistance if the child is in danger. For example, if the child is left unattended in a grocery cart, stand by the child until the parent returns.

Avoid: Avoid negative remarks or looks. These reactions are likely to increase the parents anger and make matters worse.

The Harbor Mission Statement: Our mission is to lessen the trauma to victims of sexual assault, child abuse/neglect, and other crimes and their families, and to improve the response of the criminal justice system by uniting the efforts of public agencies and enlisting support from the community. By providing a safe haven for these victims of crime, our goals are to advocate for their rights and specific needs and create an environment where violence is no longer tolerated.

The Harbor Children’s Alliance & Victim Center is dependent on monetary donations (which are tax deductible) from the community. They also have need of volunteers to serve in several capacities: clerical, special events, crime victim advocate, speaker’s bureau, mentors, and Crisis Hotline. Please contact Carissa Soliz at 552-1982 if you would like to help.

24 Hour Crisis Hotline: 361-552-4357

Help The Harbor

The Harbor Children’s Alliance & Victim Center is in need of the following items:

Wooden Trash Can Holder

Recordable DVDs

Postage Stamps

Wal-Mart Gift Cards

HEB Gift Cards

Bottled Water

Canned Sodas

Individually Packaged Snacks

They are still accepting items for their recycling efforts: used toner cartridges and old cell phones.

The Harbor is located at 215 W. Railroad St. in Port Lavaca. Office hours are Monday through Friday, 8:00 a.m. until 5:00 p.m. Their phone number is 361-552-1982.