Making Changes
They say there are certain kinds of wisdom that comes with both age and experience, and although the word ‘wisdom’ seems like we are talking about some mystical and mysterious knowledge, there is indeed a correlation between living through something and knowing how to better handle it.
For the last few years (if not before then too but in a very muddled mind state), I’ve tried wherever I can to try and guide and help anyone I can from the knowledge I do have, not to be better or be a show off but to genuinely help because I’ve had many dark days and dark moods (still do) and I wish someone would have helped me.
However, if I’m totally honest with myself, some people did try to help, I was just too full of the thoughts, patterns, and unneeded survival skills from the years of abuse and bullying that I could not see ‘help’ if it was right in front of my face.
That is part of the difficulty of making changes, it has to come from the inside out.
Whether it be quitting a habit or starting a better one, changing behavior or changing your skill set, you have to really want to do it, your will must be strong to accomplish anything like the above and honestly most of the time it is the hardest part of any change you can make
.
It is not easy and I don’t think anyone has any special or secret method for waking that part of an individual up inside.
Usually it happens after enough negative experiences push us in a direction of improvement but one can get locked just as easily into being down instead of hopeful.
I wish I had the secret formula to pass out but it doesn’t work like that, everybody has a different path to open up that door.
To me you also have to leave behind a lot of things to get there too because life is hard in a different way for everyone on the planet even those with massive advantages over others.
If there is something about your own thoughts, behaviors, or path that is eating at you it is best to really try and figure out why it is there and if you really need it anymore in your headspace especially if it does not do anything for you and even worse just brings up negative emotions.
Again, there is no magic formula but the best part about the things you let go is it is free to do and takes nothing more than thinking and doing.
Like all things worth doing it can be difficult and you may stumble or even fall a few times while making the changes but failure is always the best teacher and getting up every time you fall is the simplest recipe for success in almost any endeavor.
This column is dedicated to a friend I know would benefit from this work and I know he is capable of it, here’s hoping this column inspires him to really dig in and do it and be okay with falling off the horse as long as he’s always willing to jump back into the saddle and give taming it another shot time after time.
You got this if you want this, truly.
