Research has proven that the importance of the role of Dad has been belittled recently by many in the social media. Dads are vital to the raising of the next generation. It is important for every boy to have a positive male role model in his life for his proper development into manhood. It is imperative every girl have a positive male role model in her life in order for her to become the lady God intended. Pastor Joane and I often have discussed that the male interaction with adolescents is more impacting to the child versus the female input.
Dads, we must make the effort, no matter the challenges, to lead our children. To help us remember the points made in this article, I sue the acronym ‘LEAD THEM’ as a summary.
Love Them
Every child and every person on planet earth needs to feel loved. It matters little for us to love without the other person knowing it! I have ways of loving that are pathways to my heart, but those may not be the pathways to others hearts! We must demonstrate love by spending time with them and listening to them without judging them. Today’s youth are influenced from many arenas, so before we knock them for their ideas, take time to discover from where they are coming.
Encourage Them
By discovering our children’s dreams and interests and being present in their lives, we can provide them with encouraging words and help them overcome fears and insecurities that may be holding them back from accomplishing their potential. Praise and other forms of reward will motivate them to stretch beyond their limitations to become all they were designed to accomplish.
Ask Them
Asking our children questions is a great way to get to know what is going on inside of them and help them to think about what is important. By looking into their eyes when we are talking to them or when they are talking to us helps them know they have our full attention.
Discipline Them
Discipline is never abuse! We must learn many ways to bring correction other than just punishing them. Chores are a good way to teach our children how to take responsibility. Teaching them limits and boundaries are pathways to proper development. Showing them, not just telling them, how to respect others is a very important lesson so they can get along well with others.
Train Them
Train our children not just how to do the things we know how to do, but teach children our personal spiritual beliefs and why we believe them. Be a good role model because they will follow what we do much more quickly than what we tell them.
Have Fun With Them
Learning to play and joke around with our kids is important – play is a child’s work. They need to learn how to relax and unwind from the stresses that they have in their lives. When we were young, playing sports was just that – play. Now kids are being taught that sports must be worked at because it is the road to scholarships. We make work out of what was designed to be fun! Expose them to new experiences. Make it our goal to make memories that will outlast us.
Equip Them
Help our children understand what they are good at and provide them guidance in how they can develop their strengths. Teaching them spiritual disciplines like praying, reading their Bibles, and church attendance will carry them through the rough spots in life. We often only teach them the things that will help them in this life and often neglect to talk to them about eternal issues.
Motivate Them
Often we spend more time trying to correct bad behavior than rewarding our children for good behavior. As a result, they believe that bad behavior will get them the most attention. By teaching our children how to set goals, and rewarding them when they accomplish those goals, we encourage them to “go for the gold”.
I never had a class at any level of my training that helped me learn how to be a good dad! I believe being a real dad is the hardest task on the planet. Being a mom seems to come naturally, but the class named “dad-hood” is easily failed. Our oldest will be 40 this year, and I have often wished I had another opportunity to be a better dad. I believe that when we learn to LEAD THEM, we will have more success stories to tell at Father’s Day celebrations.