Dads are a special breed. Not better, nor more important than moms, just unique in ways God made them to be. Maybe God made man first because He knew that man was going to take a little more time and attention. And maybe God knew how much responsibility would be placed on men – to provide, protect, lead, and love – and saw the wisdom of making him a little bigger and stronger physically than his “completer”.

Dads seem to be made physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually to need and enjoy challenge and adventure. Watch little boys at play and it is easy to see “a man under construction”. They are rougher than little girls, and generally more active. They are very physical. Little boys grow up to be builders, warriors, and mountain climbers. They are usually more daring than fearful…probably why God made mothers, sisters, and wives to balance out the testosterone, and increase the likelihood of a male’s survival to maturity.

My dad is 86 and has taught me a lot of things that I wish to share with you.

1. An appreciation for God’s creation. Dad was no “tree hugger”, but he taught me to appreciate everything from wildlife and cattle to the majestic mountains to tender garden plants. All of these were God’s creations to Dad and to be cared for and used appropriately.

2. Put others first. I remember when we were attending church at Timber Ridge, when families had a hardship a special love offering would be received. One day Pastor Baker told us that a family needed special help, and I saw Dad dig into his wallet and give the best he could. Then the Pastor called Dad and Mom forward and presented the offering to them, because we had just had a storage building burn and the congregation wanted to help us. I remember Dad cried! He always wanted to help others, but it touched his heart that someone would help us!

3. Embrace people who are different. Everyone was a potential friend to Dad. After most of us kids were out of elementary school, Dad and Mom went and found other kids, those who had some kind of handicap, to share our home with. I cannot remember all the kids names, but I do remember a down-syndrome child, Teresa, who, because of our working with her, learned to be a productive member of society.

4. Patience is a virtue. Dad demonstrated the importance of working through a problem rather than just giving up and judging the problem unsolvable. No matter what task he undertook, he would stay with it until it was done, and done correctly.

5. Nobody’s perfect. Dad accepted the Lord shortly after I was born, so I never heard him use a swear word. I did see him get upset – even very angry – but he never stayed mad. I have said many times that I never saw Dad or Mom sin, but they never claimed perfection!

6. Appreciate the experience, no matter the outcome. I know in Port O’Connor, we get used to “catching”, but Dad taught us the joy of “fishing”, even if the stringer was empty when we returned home. A day in the outdoors was great…”If we catch fish, that’s a bonus.” To this day, I enjoy fishing and hunting, but will never do it alone – I always want to share these experiences with others.

7. Love your wife, unconditionally. Dad and Mom had 62 years as husband and wife. I remember Mom not feeling good a few times, and saw Dad get home from a hard day’s work and still fix supper for us kids. We never liked those “meals” because they were always “one course” – everything went into the same pot! “It will all mix anyway,” was his explanation. When Mom was dying, Dad was there every step of the journey, loving Mom and, by example, teaching me to love Joane unconditionally.

8. Take pride in your family and encourage them. Maybe it was because we lived in Oklahoma, but “seldom was heard a discouraging word…” Dad taught me that just because we were poor, we never were inferior. When I received a scholarship to attend a new university in Tulsa, Dad helped me take the old GMC pickup, that had been painted with a brush, and get it spray painted. I am sure I had the oldest vehicle on campus, and the only pickup, but most everyone wanted to double date in it.

9. Never try to impress the crowd. I never remember Dad playing golf. I have a set of clubs, but rarely get to use them. I remember playing with Thurman Fountain, a great golfer, who never made long drives, but were always well placed. He said, “Drives are for show, but putts are for dough.” Dad always taught me that even when misunderstood by the crowd, if I did what was right, I impressed the Lord and that was what I should be doing.

10. Be in church. Dad and Mom never sent us to church; they always took us! I remember once when we were moving, we had to miss Sunday services, and Dad continuously apologized to us for having to miss church. We did not attend big churches, and with five kids plus our extras, we made up a chunk of attendees. It was not that missing church was a sin, but it was a way of us telling the community that we loved and served the Lord.

Dads, as we help you celebrate your special day, I trust that you can find some lessons my dad taught me that will help you be a better dad for your children. Happy Father’s Day!